http://youtu.be/nzJG7JDM2MM
Sharpening the saw means I take care of myself through quadrant two activities that support me in self-renewal practices such as recreation, relationship building, reading for enjoyment, spending time with my nephew, family and friends, planning my week out to reduce stress and anxiety in the long run, taking time to relax and visualize my goals and desired outcomes. Engaging in activities that make me stronger as a leader, as a teacher, as an aunt, as a sister, as a daughter, as a friend, as a colleague, as a mentor, etc. so that I am that much more empowered to serve effectively in whatever role I find myself at the moment. Taking time to sharpen the saw helps me deposit into people's emotional bank accounts, rather than dip into them, resulting in my ability to expand my sphere of influence. Sharpening the saw allows me to to focus on what is important so that I don't spend valuable time on quadrant 1, 3 or 4. Sharpening the saw should be in alignment to my personal mission statement and bring me closer to my goals and not interfere with my ability to continue working towards them.
A behavioral change I intend to make involves sharpening the saw with a purpose so that I do remain in quadrant 2 while sharpening the saw and I don't accidentally somehow end up in quadrant 4, which is so easy to do during winter and summer breaks. It does not happen as often now that I have a lot more responsibilities because it just would not be responsible of me, however, reflecting on my younger years, it is possible I may have spent lots of time in quadrant 4, but I enjoyed it! Now that I am aware of habit 7 and how to apply it to my life, I intend to pay more attention to how I sharpen the saw by asking myself, "Is it helping me relax? Is it in alignment with my personal mission statement and my goals? Is it helping make me a better person? If not, then I will not engage in such activities that will only take me away from what I am trying to accomplish. Sharpening the saw should inspire, renew, and refresh me! I intend to teach my students how to purposefully sharpen the saw by having them create a list of things they like to do for fun. Then I will have them reread their personal mission statement that they created in the last few weeks. After they have reread their personal mission statement, I will ask them to circle those things from their list that are in direct alignment with their personal mission statement. They will examine and reflect on how the circled activities are different from the activities they did not circle. I will explain to them that since the circled activities are in direct alignment with their personal mission statement, those are probably activities that help them stay in quadrant 2. We will also write on post-it notes some activities that actually help us sharpen the saw and some activities that sometimes get confused with sharpening the saw, but in reality are time-wasting, or task-avoidance, activities. We will create a t-chart which will include two columns: Sharpening the Saw and Time-Wasting Activities. Then we will post the post-it notes under the correct heading. This activity will help me teach my students the difference between sharpening the saw and just wasting time. To understand someone, does not mean you have to necessarily agree with them. To understand someone means that you are listening to them, respecting their point of view, allowing them to express themselves in a risk-free and safe environment as you lend an empathic ear. As the listener, you do not probe, judge, or advise the person. Instead, you listen to understand. While the other person is speaking, you are actually listening to what they are telling you with the intent of understanding where they are coming from rather than ignoring what they are saying in an attempt to formulate a response. When you are too busy thinking of how to respond to the other person while they are still talking, then you are not listening, and if you are not listening, you cannot possibly connect with them because you are not allowing their words to touch you enough for you to put yourselves in their shoes and actually listen with empathy. When you truly listen, the message you send is, "I value you and what you have to say is important enough for me to stop what I am doing and look at you and truly listen to your words". This is a skill that must be taught, modeled and practiced. A behavioral change I plan on making in my own life is to stop interrupting people when they speak. I acknowledge that as people are speaking to me, I often make so many connections to what they're saying that I randomly burst out the connections as they come to my mind, interrupting the speaker, and often times going off on a tangent and then either the speaker forgets what they were going to say, or they're such good sports about it that they just go along with the conversation in a different direction, and never go back to their original purpose of why they were sharing those thoughts with me to begin with. I think that one of the reasons I end up interrupting with connections is to show that I'm listening and to show that I understand and connect with them, but it looks like that is not the best way to show a connection to the speaker because at that point I'm only listening to what others say through my own experiences and not as their experiences.
I plan on teaching this habit to my students as another example of creating a win-win situation. I will explain to them that when they seek to understand others first, before being understood, they are increasing their sphere of influence because they truly value others. No one wants to be around someone who does not care to listen to others and only wants to be heard. I will model this behavior with my student-teacher and then students will have a chance to practice empathic listening with a partner. I will give them different scenarios that they can role-play and I will show them the difference between empathic listening (objective) and listening with an intent to respond (subjective). My student-teacher and I will also model that it is okay to have silence between the speaker and the listener. Silence shows that you are processing the information they are giving you and also that you're not quick to want to judge, probe, or advise. I will provide them with a sheet that they can use as reference. That sheet will have three columns. One column will have examples of what we mean by judging, probing, or advising. This habit will definitely be one that will need continuous practice throughout the school year because it will take a while for us to unlearn our old behaviors and learn these new, more effective ways of listening to one another. In order to reach the level where you can synergize, you must be able to effectively carry out the first five habits. The first five habits help shape you into the type of leader that can work in synergy with others without feeling threatened, defensive, or uncreative. When you synergize, you welcome others, into your sphere of influence, to offer ideas and blend them with yours in order to create an even more creative third alternative that is better than if each person were working alone. The purpose of synergizing is to end up with an end-product that you could not have possibly created working by yourself. When you see the value of having a diverse team that has multiple lenses through which they view different situations, you magnify your worth, increase your sphere of influence and accomplish a lot more than if you just privately try to tackle a challenge. A behavioral change I intend to make is to start synergizing with a wider circle of colleagues. I do synergize a lot, but upon reflecting on whom I synergize with, I think I tend to synergize with like-minded people because that's with whom I feel comfortable. Instead of reaching out to a wider sphere of influence, for different reasons, I tend to synergize with the same group of people and I need to include multiple perspectives, not just people who will agree with me or see things the way I do. It's just easier because I have my sphere of influence easily accessible and I don't have to go out of my way to find them. I could also synergize on-line through mediums such as Twitter and different learning communities. I have found that strangers who share the same interests are very willing to synergize as well.
I will teach my students about synergizing by presenting them with a challenging math task and first asking them to try to tackle it individually and quietly. After a few minutes of them struggling, I will ask them to speak to only one partner about the challenges they are encountering with that math problem. Then I will go over turn-taking skills when speaking in larger groups, such as in groups of six, so that everyone's voice is heard. Sometimes very quiet students have brilliant ideas, but if no one encourages them to share their thoughts, they won't. After I have gone over turn-taking skills and encouraging each other to share their thoughts while the rest of them practice their listening skills, they will have the opportunity to tackle that challenging math problem as a group of six members. At the end, they will reflect on, and talk about, which method yielded better results: working alone or working with a partner or working in a larger group, in order to solve the challenging math task. When you think win-win, you synergize with the other party to think of a third option that is a better solution for both parties. Thinking win-win also includes making deposits into your colleagues' emotional bank accounts. This is easy to do when you get along with certain people, but what about the people with whom you do not necessarily click with? Anyone who's within your sphere of influence deserves to have their emotional bank account deposited into, not dipped into. This is a behavioral change I must make. I find it very easy to constantly make deposits into the emotional bank accounts of people who I find easy to work with, pleasant, charming, respectful, cooperative and funny. However, I must also start depositing into the emotional bank accounts of my adversaries! That will be quite a challenge! If my goal is to become a leader, I must accept this challenge, implement it and lead through example!
I plan on teaching this habit to my students as a problem-solving strategy. I'll ask them to work in groups and generate a list of possible conflicts that may arise between them either in the classroom, at the playground, or while eating lunch. Then, I will ask them to think of a solution that both parties feel good about. Finally, I will inform them that this habit is not only about thinking of a third option that both parties agree on, but that it is also about making deposits into your peer's emotional bank accounts. I will illustrate this point through a read-aloud using the book titled, "How Full is Your Bucket for Kids" written by Tom Rath, Mary Reckmeyer, and illustrated by: Maurie J. Manning. This children's book depicts what happens to us as individuals when you make withdrawals from people's emotional bank accounts and what happens when you make deposits. This book clearly teaches children how making deposits into people's emotional bank accounts is a win-win for everyone within their sphere of influence. After reading that book to my students to support my lesson, they will generate a list of choice words they can use when making deposits into people's emotional bank accounts. Then they will generate a list of who are the people within their sphere of influence whose emotional bank accounts they can make deposits into. I feel this lesson will develop a new habit of mind within my students in order to help them shine as leaders amongst their peers. When you start with the end in mind, then you know what your goals are and what steps you need to take to get there. In order to get there, you cannot allow roadblocks to get in the way. You must stop, think and decide what actions are going to help you get closer to your goals and which actions are going to set you back. We only have a certain amount of time each day to get things done, so we must constantly make decisions about what our priorities are and make sure they are in alignment with our goals. Then we must take action and not engage in time-wasting activities, but rather in productive activities that will be beneficial to our physical and emotional health while safeguarding us from stressful situations. Putting first things first helps us focus on what's important and make the best use of our time so that we can experience success in reaching our goals. Some behavioral changes I intend to make, in order to embrace Habit #3, are as follows: * Let go of what is not important, or beneficial, in moving me towards my goal. I have to realize that I don't have time to help everyone that "needs" my help and they just have to learn to help themselves. I don't have enough time to take care of my own stuff along with other people's situations. I have to let go and not let it bother me. * I have to learn to not let it bother me when certain people in my life refer to me as "selfish" for not having the time to take care of their issues for them. I know deep down inside that they are just calling me "selfish" because they think that they can use reverse psychology on me and that by calling me that, it will make me upset enough to prove them wrong and do whatever it is that THEY consider urgent. * I commit to stepping back and assessing the situation whenever I feel stressed out and deciding if it is a Q1, Q2, Q3, or Q4 situation. I just realized that both of the above situations land in Quadrant 3, which means it might be urgent to someone else, but not important, and those are issues and concerns that someone ELSE wants me to attend to, interrupting MY focus and making me less productive. From now on, I will identify the situation and if it lands in Q3 or Q4, I'm just going to not attend to it. I don't need to do that to myself. It's unhealthy in so many ways. * Some people do not like it when I put first things first because they realize they are not part of the equation and they don't really fit into my daily schedule. I have to learn to let go of that guilt. *I will constantly do a status check to make sure I am in Quadrant 2 as often as possible! I plan to teach Habit #3: Put First Things First to my students by presenting them with examples of what it means to be responsible and put first things first. After about four or five different examples, I will ask them to get into groups and create situations where they might be tempted to NOT put first things first. The end product will be skits that they co-create with their group. Through these skits they will depict how they show self-control in each situation where they will be tempted to engage in perhaps Q3 or Q4 activities. In these skits they will showcase how they are proactive and think with the end in mind in order to arrive to the conclusion that the best decision, at this point, is to put first things first. My students just got their iPads last week, so they can now create iMovies to showcase their skits. Looking forward to seeing what ideas my students implement! *For those of you who are reading this and are not a part of my EDL 610 class, here is a quick video you can refer to if you are wondering what I mean when I say Q1, Q2, Q3, and Q4: When you begin with the end in mind, you are the architect of your own life. You don't leave your life to chance; you take the time to design it, creating a beautiful masterpiece that is flexible enough for pleasant, and sometimes not so pleasant, surprises. The vision you have for your successful life will be flexible enough to withstand losing some important elements that no longer serve you, and also adding new elements that strengthen you as they come along, without your whole life crumbling into pieces. The vision you have for your life becomes apparent through your thoughts, your words, and your actions. When you begin with the end in mind, you live with a purpose and your thoughts, beliefs, words and actions are all in alignment with your mission statement in order for you to lead a purposeful life.
What we imagine becomes a physical manifestation. We need to have a blueprint of our personal goals, career goals, fitness goals, etc. Our imagination should not be limited by our current reality. Our current reality is a result of our past words, beliefs, and actions, not our current ones. Now that we are learning about Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind, I commit to the following behavioral changes: 1st--> Create a Personal Mission Statement AND share it with others. Not only will it keep me focused and in alignment with my goals, but by sharing it with others, if I become sidetracked they can be a source of support and encouragement so I can more easily get back on track. 2nd-->I commit to being more careful with what I say because sometimes I say things that are not in alignment with what I really believe just because at the moment I'm feeling frustrated. When I'm frustrated, I will say negative things that not only go against my beliefs, but also against my actions. It's easier to say things out of frustration then it is to do things out of frustration. My actions and beliefs seem to be in alignment a lot more often than my words when I'm frustrated. 3rd-->In order to be a strong and efficient leader, I commit to being more aware of my actions, beliefs and words in order to lead by example and continue to increase my sphere of influence. I plan to teach Habit 2: Begin With the End in Mind to my students through mini-goal setting sessions. One example of this is as follows: I will ask them to write their current reading level on the corner of a piece of construction paper. Then on the corner diagonal to it, they will write down the reading level they wish to be at. They will proceed by creating a curvy pathway from where they currently stand to where they wish to be in the near future. On this pathway, they will write down at least three different actions they could take that will help them reach their new reading goal. I will give them examples of how their actions, beliefs and words they speak are in alignment with their goals. Will their actions, beliefs and words help them get to their new goals, or will they take them in a completely different direction? If they discover that their current beliefs, actions and words are not getting them closer to their goals, I will help them replace them with new ones that WILL serve them. I will also teach Habit 2: Begin With the End in Mind by helping my students create their own Mission Statement and then guiding them in the creation of a class mission statement. It is definitely a flexible work in progress and as we go along, I will think of other creative and engaging ways of teaching my students Habit 2.
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Cristal HerreraIncorporating Stephen Covey's 7 Habits into my professional and personal life. Archives
March 2015
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